The last few weeks have been a struggle; they’ve thrown me
for a loop. I started the third trimester of my pregnancy and as soon as that
happened it’s like the flip was switched, back to no energy.
I’ve also been going back and forth on the direction of Source
One, the blog in particular. Debating whether to keep the post strictly
professional/informational or adding a more personal touch with stories,
examples, insights from my own life. I was leaning towards adding some personal
aspects, but how much is too much? How much did I want to share and how much do
you want to see?
I am taking one recent event in my life as a sign to go for
it, to share more. One of my ultimate goals is to connect with my audience,
inspire, relate, and be real. I don’t eat perfectly everyday, I don’t exercise
everyday and I’m not ALWAYS positive, upbeat and optimistic. Like everyone, all
of my days are not all filled with sunshine and smiles, or kale and quinoa :)
In the 29th week of my pregnancy, I went in to
the doctor for a routine appointment with an ultrasound. My husband and I were
so excited to see our little boy, as we had not done so in 2 months. We really
didn’t have any good pictures of him, as at the last appointment they were all
pretty alien looking. We were looking forward to seeing him, his growth, and
maybe getting a better idea of some of his features. Well, he had different
plans. He was all smooshed up against me, had his hands on his face and
possibly in his mouth. The doctor said, “I guess we will have to wait until he
is born to see what he looks like.” I was pretty disappointed.
That appointment also involved the infamous glucose
screening test. I got in my car that morning, 50 gram glucose flat orange soda
like concoction in hand and headed to the doctors office. I chugged it 45
minutes prior to my appointment time as directed. (Side note: I had to leave the
house an hour and 15 minutes prior to the appointment to get there on time even
though it’s about 18 miles away, but it’s Atlanta!)
The nurse came in at one point during the ultrasound to draw
my blood, right at the one hour mark after I had reported finishing the drink.
This was not done as a finger stick with instant results, much to my dismay,
but it was going to be sent to a lab in New Jersey to be analyzed and then I
would get a call about the results.
The appointment was on a Thursday and the following morning
I got a voice mail from the office stating that I had FAILED the test and would
need to come in for the 3 hour test. I knew this was a possibility as both Type
1 and gestational diabetes run in my family, but it was still a punch in the
stomach.
Not only did I not want to have to deal with going back in,
drinking more of the dreaded sugar concoction, sitting in the office for 3
hours, and having my blood drawn 4 times, I just didn’t want this in my chart.
Throughout the entire pregnancy thus far, everything was normal. The concerns
area in my chart was empty and I wanted it to stay that way. I didn’t want this
red flag to limit my choices or force me into a direction that I did not want,
in regards to labor and delivery.
I scheduled the 3 hour glucose tolerance test for the
following Tuesday morning, just wanting to get it out of the way. The night
before, I ate dinner at 7 and had nothing to eat or drink afterwards. I went to
bed hungry and woke up ravenous. It was a morning of terrible storms, so I left
home really early. It took almost an hour and a half to make the 18 mile trek
and let me tell you, you want nothing to do with a pregnant lady that has had
zero calories over the last 12 hours that is currently having to maneuver
through Atlanta traffic, in the rain.
I make it to the office, have my fasting blood glucose drawn
and drink the 100 gram glucose drink. Not only did I get double the sugar this
time (on an empty stomach) I got to choose my flavor! I told her I would get
crazy that morning and I chose the punch flavor over the orange flavor. I was
then sent to the waiting room and would be summoned after an hour to have my
blood drawn again. I’ll spare all of the details of the events that transpired
over the next few hours because there aren’t many, none exciting anyway. I was
just told not to have water or gum and not to walk around. After the final tube
of blood was drawn I was sent home, again being told the blood was being sent
off and I would hear back about the results.
The next day, I get another voice mail from the doctor’s
office, “You have failed the 3 hour test; you are a gestational diabetic.” I
cried, and I cried, and I cried. I’m not sure it could be called crying,
bawling maybe? I was so upset, I felt defeated, I don’t know what I felt…
Again, this runs in the family and I was aware that it was a
definite possibility. Also, as a dietitian, I knew every intricate detail of what
it meant, what I would need to do, etc. But, at that moment I wasn’t a
dietitian. I was an emotional, hormonal, mom-to-be.
Not long after the news was received, it was lunchtime. I
was hungry, but I thought, what am I going to eat?!? I felt that the news
received only moments earlier severely limited my choices. I opted for some
protein and vegetables that were already cooked and waiting in the
refrigerator. Shortly after, I headed out for a walk.
On this walk, I calmed down and began telling myself that it
was going to be OK. I even talked to the baby and told him that it was going to
be OK; that I knew what to do to keep him healthy and that that’s what I was
going to do.
I’m still overwhelmed by it and wish it weren’t so. But, I
have all the knowledge that I would ever need in order to keep the baby and
myself healthy for the remainder of the pregnancy. I’m going to pass on the ice
cream (my only pregnancy craving) and walk after every meal, because I know
that’s what works for me.
Again, I am taking this one personal event as a sign, as the
push to start sharing more with the audience of Source One. In hopes that one
day you might come across something that you can relate to, maybe even
something that inspires you.
Have you gone through a similar experience? Please feel free
comment below or send me a private message at Jodie@sourceonenutrition.com.
Also, there are SO many Brene Brown quotes that I love. Read more here : Brene Brown Quotes
